A Few Familial Facts

As I mentioned, I come from a family of 16 children. All are whole, from the same mom and dad, and yes, there are two sets of twins (back to back, might I add). That little fact seems to make people feel better about the whole situation. Because of the very rare and interesting dynamics of my family, all 16 of us have developed very peculiar views of the familial world in which we live. For example, I have been a great aunt since I was 18 (well, I've always been a GREAT aunt, but you know what I mean). My oldest niece Nichole is 3 years older than I and now has 4 children. Last I checked (which was a month or two ago) I had 75 nieces and nephews. For all I know by now I might have 76 or even 78. I couldn't tell you which of my Sisters or Sisters-in-law are pregnant and certainly not how pregnant they are. Of the 400 people that are descended from or married into my grandparents family of 11 children, my father's family alone comprises 110 of them. Upon learning of the massive dynamics of my family I was once asked by a recent acquaintance to list all the names of my nieces and nephews. I did so, and in the list there were at least 3 Joseph's, 2 Michael's, 2 Hannah's and probably a few more duplicates. I had some trouble remembering the name of a few of those more recently born. My oldest Sister is creeping up on 50, and my younger brother coming up on 21. My mother was 47 when the last was born and my father 57. My dad in two short years will reach the ripe old age of 80. My 3 nieces who are older than I played the role of cousins during my childhood years, and those younger than I but still close in age now serve the function as close friends and roommates. It was as if I were being raised by my grandparents because of my parent's age, but I have come to really appreciate it. My parents were seasoned child-raising veterans and I never felt either neglected nor smothered, and they always knew how to explain to me why I should behave a certain way. When I understood that it was right, it was never hard for me to behave well.

I have often been asked "Do you feel close to all your siblings?" The answer is yes, but I think my definition of "close" is very different from that of the member of a regular-sized family. I don't have the memory span each week or even month to call each of my siblings up and have a chat about what's going on in their lives. I don't always remember everyone's birthday, but when I do they at least get a nice text or facebook message. I usually find out about births, moving or buying a house or other significant goings-on in the family through the grapevine or on facebook. This sort of relationship with my siblings would not be considered "close" in the eyes of many, but that isn't what defines it for me. We all love each other because we learned how to work hard together. Because there are so many of us with so many different personalities we had to learn early how to adjust our own behavior to please my contention-sensitive mother. We learned that it was much a more pleasant feeling to be happy than to be irritated or upset, so we learned how to not let the fickle things others did bother us. Because we grew up under the same roof, we can all expect to be held by the same standard of excellence, educationally as well as spiritually. Laziness has never been a part of my family culture.

For the most part my siblings have very much to do with the decisions I make from day to day. I can't say we were all raised by the same parents because my mother 40 years ago is a very different person from my mother now, but the fundamentals are still the same. My mother and father have always built the foundation of our family on the rock of Jesus Christ, and we all adhere to that. I am expected by all of my siblings -- especially my Sisters -- to toe the line when it comes to how I behave, who I date, where I go, and what I do with my life. Because of the incredible examples they have been and where they have taken their lives, I have some pretty big shoes to fill.

My parents have been incredibly successful in raising this family. We certainly are not without our problems but just to illustrate, two Septembers ago my parents sent out my little brother, the 15th full time missionary to serve from my immediate family. When he went through the Temple to receive his endowments, my mother's lifelong dream came true of having all 16 of her children attend the same Temple session. Not only are all still active and Temple-worthy, but all (if applicable) have married exceptionally well and all are educated, successful and are giving back to the communities in which they reside.

When we all get together to talk about it, we always attribute it to my parent's unwavering faith and unfailing devotion to teach us the Gospel. During my grade-school years, I could expect to be woken up at 6:30 in the morning, right after my Mom would get home from her early morning run. While we were getting ready for school my mom would go in the kitchen and prepare breakfast for us. While we were eating breakfast she would use that time to teach us from the scriptures, particularly the Book of Mormon. We would then pray together and she would send us on our merry way to school. She tells us that there were mornings when she didn't want to get up, but on one particular morning she heard a voice loud in her ear say "if you don't get up and teach your children the scriptures, you will lose one or more." This was enough motivation to get her moving, and we scarcely missed a morning study session.

I don't know what I did in the pre-mortal life to deserve the family I was born into, but I couldn't be more grateful for my life now. "Everything I am or hope to be, I owe to my Angel mother." - Abraham Lincoln

To read an article about my family in the Deseret News, click here!: http://www.deseretnews.com/article/705374512/Hurricane-Utah-family-sends-out-more-than-a-dozen-missionaries.html